Living down here in the FLA among the older generations, I have made several observations. Most of these observations are about the Old Men I come in contact with. These Old Cockers are the best. I love to talk with ‘em and bust their balls and listen them go on about crazy shit. Anyways, I thought I would try to remember some of the stuff and send it on as the OMO Report (Old Man Observations).


Don't Get Old.

1.
Old Men don’t listen. They just wait for you to shut the fuck up so they can tell you how it really is.

2.
Old Men are not “harmless”. All guys just wanna bang chicks. Any guy who says they don’t is lying. Those old guys who seem cute and sweet, are just as nasty as the young bucks, but the old guys play the only card they got left. It doesn’t matter if you are as young as their grandkids; they are watching you and thinking some nasty shit.

3.
Conspiracies. Old Men are convinced that; A. The print in newspapers is not only printed lighter, but smaller every year. B. Young people are stupid. C. Youth is wasted on the young. D. People are stealing from them. E. They should conserve their energy for when they really need it. F. Young chicks love older guys. G. The Moral Standard has vanished. H. Business Ethnics have vanished. I. Everything was better in their day.

4.
PGS- Pretty Girl Syndrome. Although this one is really about Old Women, it was too good to leave out. All the Old Ladies who used to be hot and get attention from every dude, and everything they said was like brilliant, and they would always get free shit are now really mad that dudes, especially young dudes, ignore them and don’t wanna try and bang them anymore. This makes these old broads crazy. They then hate the young hot chicks and complain about everything just so they get some attention like the old days. Advice to pretty young girls: Unless you’re smart, DON’T GET OLD.

So remember, that nice old guy or gal you see walking down the street either hates your guts or wants to bang you (not matter how interesting you think you are).